My dad was talking yesterday with the teachers ... all said they are very worried. There I am always stunned when these things happen, because I do not expect someone known my existence, let alone my behavior that apparently are decidedly abnormal. Unfortunately those who do not want to be looked at is watched, those who do not want attention it receives in spades, who wants to be forgotten is remembered. In some ways I feel persecuted. My father told me that during the Class Council have spoken at length about my problems; I feared that such a thing happen, and I was prepared, but I never imagined that the maths teacher and my dad to exchange e-mail in order to stay in touch in case something happens ... but what afraid that happen? Can I deduct it, but I can not imagine all the fuss, all this fear.
have a case so serious? Do 'so much to see that a deranged? Why all this attention?
Maybe at the end of everything, I realize that this beast is just a little girl who wanted to ask me something, but I could not hear it. Then his tears due to my inability to play has resulted in my silence, my fasting, my throw away the food, my hidden tears, all the cold showers to desensitize the body, reaching not hear anything, all the scratches and bites on her hands every time I go to the restaurant or pizzeria . The beast that wants me to perfect in everything, they want to see my body looks thin and lost people before it, is nothing but a girl eager for affection, but completely incapable of admitting it.
The beast I am.
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